Seriously. I woke up at 6:45 in a foul mood... which only proved fouler when I broke mom's mirror while backing out of the garage. Great. So I was without a car today.
School was such a waste. In guard, Scott didn't show up and we napped on the cold floor. In math, we napped and watched Youtube. In art, we sat around and talked and tried to play Mad Libs. Like there was really no use in coming to school today at all... Except to pick up my art project.
Gah. I'm just in an awful mood. My eyes are still swollen and watery, my back is sore, and my pulled muscles are hurting. I'm really lethargic and tired... I just want to lay around and do nothing. Dad's not letting me out tonight, either, because I'll get sick again like last time... whatever. But I think I might possibly be getting sick again... oh no. I just feel like utter crap.
You know, it's amazing how I've created this mask that my friends fail to see though. It's common knowledge that if I'm overly irritable, grouchy, a tad too rude, and withdrawn, they just assume it's my typical morning routine. They can't tell the difference between "just another Marissa mood" and when I'm seriously upset. Same thing with Sims. When I'm feeling particularly sad, depressed, angry, or the like, I usually play Sims because it helps take my mind off things. How is it that no one still has noticed? How many nights have I told Jamie that I'd probably rather stay home and play Sims than do happier things? Why is it that my friends notice things about each other so easily, but when it comes to me, no one says a word?
Just an observation.
xx With Beauty Underneath, The Ever Free Marz
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