Day Two Of The Ice Storm

And on day two, the ice was still encompassing all of Carrollton.

I woke up at 12:30ish and came downstairs to eat. After making a sandwich, I sat down and watched some Metalocalypse online and after a few chats on Facebook, proceeded to play another round of Sims. I made a new neighborhood and a new version of me and Emma, now named Kukka, for me to create a new world in. I wonder what I'll do with this one, since the other one had the House of Grey and that badass castle I built! Should I abandon the Ara Grey plot, or just create her as like, my BFF? I dunno.

I have to read Beowulf... I'll do it tomorrow, since there's also no school then.

I dunno, last night got me to thinking some more about the chain of events in my life and my future and things I did in the past and what they mean now. Just another philosophical life think. Lots of "What Ifs", too. What if I hadn't been such a dick to Karl? What if I'd have never dated Anthony? What if I'd never had gym class with Sonya? What if I gave up guard for art? What if, what if, what if. Then I look towards my future... what's that gonna be like? Will I ever make it to art school? Will I graduate college happy and with a good degree? Will I make bad choices?

I also feel sort of... pigeonholed. Trapped. On display, but behind the silver bars of the cage. Kind of locked away from the world. As Tuomas wrote, "A nightingale in a golden cage, that's me, locked inside reality's maze." It just came to mind... kind of fitting, but not really. I feel like maybe being pigeonholed might set me back, but then I look at myself and ask, isn't this what I always wanted?

xx Bring Me Home Or Leave Me Be Marz