Everything's Changing

No, not like Avril, ha ha. It's weird coming home, because it doesn't feel like home. Everything is changed and different. The washer and dryer we've had since I was born have been replaced. There's wood floors everywhere. The rug is hard to walk on. The kitchen is all new. The phone from the office is in the kitchen. Even the TV guide setup is different. Mom's face is different (Although I've yet to see it). Just nothing feels right here.

It's like... all I did was move out and now everything's all new. It feels so damn weird. I just want something homey.

xx I'm Out Of My Control, I'm A Mobile Marz

Nothing Gets You More Excited

For a new album and movie like a T-shirt and two disc package.

Not sure if I like the shirt or not, but it's growing on me. I like the back more than the front I think. You know, this sort of reminds me of Cirque Du Freak meets Nightwish. Mmmmm. Me gusta. Nightwish Shop, Y U SO expensive?! But they do have a TON of cool new shirts. The art is really well done! I might have to buy one eventually. But only if it's got words on the back. I'm sad that the red dancer girl only comes in girly fit, because I don't like how they fit me, ironically. Maybe it's because the smalls are too small. I might try a medium, that'll probably work better. We'll see, I might just buy a regular cut shirt and call it a day. Can't go wrong with that small. DAMN YOU, EUROPEAN SIZING!

xx We're Simply Meant To Be Marz

Time To Be A Good Woman

So it's no secret that I love costumes and costume making. I've been pretty fortunate to be so crafty and have the ability to get away with simple hand sewing, but I've got my eyes set on big designs. And thus, I have decided to invest in a sewing machine. I have to do some research to find which one will probably work best for me, but when I do... oh man. I'm seeing all sorts of things.

I'm excited, because I love clothes and modding stuff and this could be fun :P Cons will be so much easier...

On a side note, I'm starving but don't want to go downstairs and eat alone. Bahh, I guess I will, because I'm starving. Then I really need to get started on my art for real. AND THE HEIR IS SO GOOD SO FAR. I'm glad I bought my first eBook and I'm glad I picked a raunchy tale. Mmmmm, this is gonna be good. Only ten pages in and she's seen the goods?! How interesting. MOAR.

xx Moonlight, Feels So Nice Marz

TRUE SAINTS?!

So I'm at Willowbend yesterday and I was like, "I wonder what store is in Metropark's location." So I walked by and I was amazed. It was an even better store called True Saints, and it had just opened that day. They don't carry Primeval, but they told me Primeval is made by Salvage, and they carry TONS of Salvage clothes, which also happen to be twice as much as Primeval. BUT THEY'RE SO CUTE. The people there were so awesome and offered me a job, which I wish I could have taken. If ONLY I wasn't in Denton, I would have accepted right then and there. They thought I was cool :D Now I need to get a job somewhere to make enough money for those. Mmmmm. I know what I want for Christmas.

The weird thing is there's not many places that sell a lot of Salvage shirts online. Amazon had some cool ones. Me gusta.



I just love this line. The colors, the textures, the layers, the metal and the lace, the silhouettes, and the sexy fit. LOVE it. It's like a bunch of designers threw out exactly what I want in my clothes.

xx We Have Not Forgotten Marz

Being Alone

You know, I've kind of realized how much I don't like being alone now. There's something peaceful about walking back to the dorm at sunset, but there's also something lonely. Funny, because I used to believe that I was a solitary person that thrived in isolation. I used to think people can't be trusted and are just out to get a piece of you.

But now... it's just weird. I eat alone sometimes. I walk to class alone sometimes. I sit in my room when Dorothy goes out with friends. I guess I've begun to crave company. Someone to be with, to show a sense of belonging to.

But people are so irritating and stupid. They talkk too much, they have obnoxious personalities, they lie. So it's hard to desire something that's so illogical. I might be surrounded by 36,000 other people, but being at college has made me feel lonelier than ever.

xx You Took Me Higher Than The Mountains I Have Climbed Marz

KAMELOTTTTTT

Ha ha, I'm writing this in design class. Half asleep. Hell, I even took a nap during critique time!

Anyways. Last night was awesome. The first band was ok, but the screaming and growling just doesn't do it for me. Shame too, cause she had a nice singing voice. They reminded me of Krypteria and Sirenia having a love child. The second band was a lot better and had some great sounds and fabulous hair. Third band was waaaaay crazy cool! I'm glad I got to see them, cause they were so damn cool. I love that kind of stuff.

AND THEN KAMELOTTTTTTTT. Wow. They were so awesome! Not to mention they played a ton of my favorite songs, like Soul Society, The Human Stain, Abandoned, March of Mephisto, Center of the Universe, When the Lights Are Down, and Somewhere in Time. You couldn't hear the chicks too well, but they weren't that good. THE BASSIST WINKED AT ME after holding my gaze. AND I HAD THOMAS YOUNGBLOOD'S CROTCH IN MY FACE. Me gusta. I liked his pants... ha ha. Please, step a little closer...

Fabio really wowed me the most. With Roy Khan leaving, I was kind of worried about what they'd sound like. But Fabio was absolutely incredible and definitely delivered the fantastic vibrato and power that Kamelot requires. Not to mention... Italian men are charming. He did a great job and sweated on me, ha ha. I'd go see Rhapsody of Fire to see him again!

That was a fantastic show :) Great bands and good company! I wish it never had to end.

xx A Flawless Soul Society Marz

Tunes Of The Day

Musically Excited

Oh wow, so today while walking back from class (which ended at 8:30, awww yeah!), I was checking Facebook on my phone and saw that Anette Olzon Central posted new promo images for Nightwish's Imaginaerum! I'm so excited for it! Not only are we getting another epic masterpiece of an album set for a January 2012 release, BUT WE'RE GETTING A MOVIE TO GO WITH IT. Ahhhhhh! It's like all my dreams came true.

The tracklist:
1. Taikatalvi
2. Storytime
3. Ghost River
4. Slow, Love, Slow
5. I Want My Tears Back
6. Scaretale
7. Arabesque
8. Turn Loose The Mermaids
9. Rest Calm
10. The Crow, The Owl And The Dove
11. Last Ride Of The Day
12. Song Of Myself
13. Imaginaerum

And from what I've heard, either the first or last track is gonna be another "Poet and the Pendulum" length song, going towards 14 minutes I think. "Storytime" will be released in November, and I imagine based on Tuomas's description of it, that it'll be the super crazy popular song mush like "Amaranth". The track titles are... a bit odd compared to what I would have imagined them to be. "I Want My Tears Back" and "Slow, Love, Slow" just don't fit to me. Neither does "Last Ride of the Day", but who knows. This review is giving me chills! I'M SO EXCITEDDDDDDDD. My babies!

Look at them being all majestic and dark and mysterious. YAY NEW PROMOS. One day... one day Marco will see the light and leave his wife for me. If not, I'll take Tuomas as a very nice compromise.

xx One Fragrant Rose Worth Ten Times What I Am Marz

My Favorite Blackmore's Night Songs

Streets of London
Magical World
Spirit of the Sea
Diamonds and Rust
Queen For A Day
Where Are We Going From Here
Dandelion Wine
Mid Winter's Night
Be Mine Tonight
Play Minstrel Play
Far Far Away
Renaissance Faire
Wish You Were Here
Castles and Dreams
Self Portrait
Village Lantern

Always Good To Be Back Home Again

Well I will say it's terribly depressing to be sitting all alone in your dorm room at 10:50 PM. Although it was kind of nice to spend my afternoon/evening watching Practical Magic and Hunchback while working on my tape project and playing Minecraft, I do find Heather to be quite the hooker for blowing me off today. I left Dallas early for nothing. I could have totally stayed an extra, oh, FOUR HOURS. Oh well, all in the past.

It was such a nice weekend, though. Definitely the kind I needed; a weekend filled with love and food and good company and fun and sleep and laughing and no worries. I love it, and if I could, I'd go back and relive it all over again. I want more weekends like that.

I'm not even that tired. Although it would be really nice to get to bed before 12:30 to ensure a decent sleep! It's odd going to bed alone, without anyone in the room or anyone next to me, no one to talk to or make familiar sounds our get up to pee. It's weird. It's also funny, because I used to like being alone so much and now it's just sort of off feeling.

I sometimes think of those things Dorothy asked me. No, I often think of them. The way she so easily asked kind of threw me off, and I couldn't give her a straight answer. I know the real answer, but she doesn't have to. I know it, and I stand by it. Will it get me into trouble? Probably. But that's mostly because I'm too idealistic and like to get carried away. Then again, the idealism helps. Enter Esdeline and Nathaniel. I have a funny way of coping with real life sometimes.

Oh well. It was fun watching Practical Magic because while watching, I got this nostalgic rush back to when I was younger and wanted to live in a big manor house with a garden and spires and the round bit on the corner of the house with windows and a seat. I wanted to run around with long hair and wear light fabric dresses and have a big library. The country witchy thing, you know? No doubt a direct result of watching so much Charmed as a kid. And when I used to be younger, walking Emma down those streets north of my street with the manorish houses was always so fun. I'd used to walk and plan my dream house.

Ahhh, day dreaming. Idealism. My foes and friends.

xx Someday Someone Will Ask You A Question And You Better Say Yes Marz

There's Rain Outside

I'm laying in bed.
I'm looking out the window.
It's cold, but I'm warm.
I like it here.
Can I stay?

Moar Pain?!

Jesus. So now I have this horrible pain in my left knee and the cramp on my left side is back with a vengeance. What's wrong with me?! Can I get better please? And I still have to pee every twenty minutes... way annoying. Gah.

Well today was fun. I did some good work in drawing class and we watched Frida in art appreciation. I love that movie! It's so dramatic and colorful and romantic and emotional and sexy and artsy all in the same film. It makes me want to paint and then go have wild monkey sex and then dress up in suits and photobomb family portraits. Way cool.

And then I spent my afternoon off just watching Netflix and trying to do some more silhouette thumbnails. I watched The Addams Family show, The Munsters, and Man of La Mancha. Those titles pretty much summed up my childhood. I remember watching The Munsters and Addams Family when mom would take me with her to babysit. See, I watched creepy shit from an early early age!

I don't know, I'm just feeling off. I need to draw more, but I have no motivation. I need to properly organize my design stuff and look over the next project. I need to hang up the fabric on my bed. So much to do, so little time and motivation. Not to mention the pain.

xx Understand What I've Become Marz

So Tired Of Being Sick

So it's been a rough year sickness wise, and that's naturally frustrating. Well I got home last week to see that Dr. Case sent my lab results home and woo hoo, I have *another* UTI with a new bacteria. Seriously? It's annoying as hell. Not to mention my stomach has been crappy lately and something is definitely wrong in my lower GI. I think I'm getting sicker... and there's blood to prove it.

Upper GI I can deal with, but lower? Please God no, anything but that. I do NOT want to go back to the doctor. Who do I go see? The stomach doctor or the regular one? WHY CAN'T I BE NORMAL. I'm just worried because I did a symptom checker on Mayo Clinic and naturally, it gave me scary results. I don't know what to do, cause I just don't have the time to see a doctor, which class and Philly and all this stuff going on.

Wow, I didn't think it could get worse, but apparently it has.

xx Where He Had Been That Fateful Night, A Secret It Must Stay Marz