A Very Good Idea

I'm not religious, but I adore Botticelli and I'm very much in love with the idea of getting this Mary he painted on my side. The way he depicts her is absolutely gorgeous and I really want to get a painting done on me somewhere, so why not my boy Sandro's tempura?! Like I really love this idea. And I'd even get it in color, but that's probably at least a three hundred dollar piece. Maybe two fifty. Can I have this for my birthday? Oh it's gonna hurt like a bitch on my side.

xx I'll Be your Candle On The Water Marz

On The Saddest Halloween

You know, this is the first Halloween I've had in four years. And oddly enough, I just can't enjoy it. Couldn't put together a decent class-friendly costume, couldn't find the appetite to eat, and I can't find the will to stay awake. Not to mention Dorothy and friends are going to parties tonight, which makes me feel weird. It's like, I have a lot of work to do, and I just don't feel right at a party. I don't want to get shitfaced and find myself in a situation. I don't like people, and I don't trust people. But I feel like I always turn down Dorothy's invites to social events, which makes me think she sees me differently. I dunno.

I'm just not in a good mood. Maybe it's the layers of powder and eyeliner in my eyes, or something else, but I just feel like having a good cry/sleep. It's been a hard day of cold sweats, upset stomach, heartburn, and irritability. All I ate today was a burger and fries and some Starbucks, so I don't know. It's like I'm craving something, but I don't know what.

I don't want to do design work. I want to read A Rose In Winter and forget my problems.

xx Take Me Home To A House On A Hill Marz

Colors I'm Missing

Urban Decay




MUFE




Dad gave me some money... should I splurge on myself?! The irony: I never wear eye shadow during the week, just on the weekends. I kind of want to get the dark Sephora Moonshadow palette... is very pretty. But so are Kat's new goods! Gahhh. I don't need any more makeup. Yes I do. I WANT IT ALL.

xx Dying Souls Of Mankind Marz

I LOVE YOU BABY

LOVE ME, HEATH. LOVE ME.

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST

HOLY SANTA CLAUS SHIT.

I CANNOT get over how phenomenal Beauty and the Beast was. The stage was framed with this gorgeous baroque filigree pattern and had a large glowing rose in the background. Fabulous. And everything about the show was just out of this world! The actors did every song perfectly and the choreography was really well done :) I still can't get over how beautiful the castle scenes were, with the melting gothic cathedral window as the background with the torn drapey curtains framing it all. And the beeeeeautiful metal staircases they built and moved around to show the different rooms were gorgeous! I want some.

I had the biggest smile on my face the whole time, from the first note of the overture allllllll the way to the group bowing at the end. I can't even begin to describe the feeling I had the whole time. I guess I could start with a feeling of love, because it's a love story after all. But I felt that same warm feeling, the heat on my back, and the same optimism. That's why I think I adore love stories and romantic books and movies, because I love feeling the feeling of love. It's hard to properly blog about, but I know what I'm talking about!

Videos from the show :) And I want to go see it ten more times.




xx Two Hearts As One Marz

I Need A New Book!

So I finished my book today. SO HARRY ENDED UP BEING IN LOVE WITH GENEVIEVE AND PROPOSED TO HER. She said yes! I was absolutely furious that she chose him and that the duke left. Good thing she realized this too and booked it straight to Falconbridge's house so she could tell him how much she loved him, and vice versa. I'm so glad she married the duke :) What's with all these HR girls getting multiple proposals? That seems so unromantic.

I want to get another book so bad, but I have no money for it. Maybe some other time! I won't have time for it this weekend anyways, what with driving to Tyler and a weekend with my bestest friend and my favorite musical. It's hard to imagine that Beauty and the Beast has even beat out Man of La Mancha, my childhood favorite musical. I FREAKING LOVE MUSICALS, ALRIGHT.

I'm oddly tired, but not tired at the same time. Just sort of mellow. Maybe I'll play some Gamecube :P It's no Xbox, but... close. It is a box, after all. I wish it was Wedding Sunday so there'd be good TV on! It's funny how I have no desire to really even watch TV. I'd paint if I had paints here :(

xx No More Talk Of Darkness Marz

Paraniod and Paranoider

Last night I was reading What I Did For A Duke and it was finally going somewhere! It's cute how Moncrieffe tried to learn about art to be able to show affection for Genevieve, and how he SEDUCED HER INTO HAVING HOT WILD MONKEY SEX. New shit keeps happening and I will admit that I'm loving the character's backstories. I'm honestly not sure where the book will end, because although Moncrieffe is trying to help her win back Harry, he still obviously has a thing for her since, well, the thing with the roses and the art and the hot wild monkey sex. But who will Genny end up with? DOES HARRY MARRY MILLICENT INSTEAD? WILL IAN AND THE DUKE FIGHT FINALLY?! There's like, a huge web of character interactions and I will say that that's keeping me hooked.

But after I put the book/phone away, I had the worst trouble going to sleep. I was just so awake and kept hearing the strangest sounds in the room. Of course it didn't help that Dorothy wasn't in the room. Bahhhh, what's wrong with me. Maybe I'll sleep better tonight, and if not, there's always tomorrow.

You know, I want to write again, but I'm not sure what exactly. I want to do a historical piece, but that requires lots of research and accuracy and things like that, which while I'm fine doing, will just end up taking forever. Well if I don't do historical, I'll do fantasy, but I keep running into dead ends. I do like Inni and Marko's world, so maybe I can play with that a bit and tweak it some more, or at the least, make some more art from it :P And if I didn't do fantasy, I don't know what.

Hmmm. I think I'm going to spend a lot of the design lecture rewriting Inni's story. I have so much art about the story, so I might as well do something with it. And maybe paint Marko sometime :P

xx And So It Is Just Like You Said It Would Be Marz

CAUSE WHEN THE LIGHTS ARE DOWN

THERE'S NO MORE TO SAY! LOVE IS THE REAAAAAAALLLL PAIN!

Oh Kamelot. I love you, and I love that you played this song at the show. Well I just finished one motif of a cute little Bialetti coffee pot, and have fourish more hours to finish two more and finish my perspective drawing. I think I'll be good on time, but you never know! It's another quiet night of Dorothy being out and me in the room. It's a good thing though, I like listening to my music :P

Seriously, once Thursday morning is over, no more stress. I'll be good for awhile, but I NEED TO DO A MOTIF LIKE, EVERY OTHER DAY. So I don't fall behind again for finals. This is gonna be such a good weekend after drawing on Wednesday! Lunch with Annie Fannie, dinner with the greatest person on earth, and then a weekend with my best friend and favorite musical. Love love love it all!

HOLY SHIT. I CAVED IN AND FINALLY BOUGHT SOME SWEATS. I love these things like no other. The girl sweats were all thin and had no pockets, but the guy sweats... oh God. These are so thick and soft and POCKETED and loose and comfy and there's SO MUCH CROTCH ROOM. Girl pants suck. Now I'll stop bitching about sweats... well, maybe I want a few more pairs. Mmmmm. These are seriously the best things I've ever put on my legs.

TIME FOR MOAR ARTZ.

xx How Could I Be Condemned For The Things I Have Done Marz

JESUS GIVE ME SOME ADDERAL.

OH MY GREAT GAPING BANANA NUT FRIED DING DONG HO HO GIRL. I just want to sit here and eat gummy worms and watch a movie. I have zero focus to draw and so much shit to do. So. Much. I already got one motif done today and need to do like, two more. And get those damn gestures out of the way, ugh.

Why am I even blogging about this! There's this odd smell I keep smelling in the room, sort of like rotten maple syrup and old food. But what is it and where is it coming from?! HARD TO FOCUS WHEN YOUR ROOM SMELLS LIKE AN ASS. BLURSGGHHDGHNDDFGGGGFFFF.

xx SOMEHOW I KNOW THAT I AM HAUNTED TO BE WANTED MARZ

Someday

On A Sunday

Wellllll I'm back in my wonderful dorm room. And by wonderful I mean dear God awful. I unpacked all my clean clothes, dirty clothes, foods, and arts, now it's just up to me to get up off my ass and start painting. I'm kinda hungry though, so I might go down and eat and then come up to work. I can read What I Did For A Duke and see if Moncrieffe ever finally gets Genevieve's attention/gets her into bed, whether Harry proposes to Millicent, and see if Ian ever gets his revenge. It's almost annoying how many different little plot lines are going on at the same time, but here's hoping it gets better.

Bah. I'm all sad being here. It's lonely and has no furry creatures for me to love on :(

xx Baby I'mma Dance In The Dark Marz

Roses On The Doorstep, Eh?

Why was he tagged in that photo? Is he the one she discovered? Did he do that for her? Wouldn't surprise me, he did it for me once too, minus the sweet note. Why does she look similar to me?

More so, why the hell do I care?

It was such a stupid time. Everytime I look back on it, I don't remember anything good. No, I guess it had its moments, but was just a fated disaster. I learned my lesson. Don't date people until you spend the time seeing if they're worth it or not. And don't do it because it's the convenient, easy way out. Don't listen to your friends either, because they think they know what's best for you and your relationships despite the fact that they're in shitty ones, too.

Ironically, I told Dorothy all about how awful that experience was today before I even saw Facebook.

I have no idea where that rant came from.

xx You Put The Keys In The Car And Drive Marz

YAY KAT!

So I'm browsing Sephora online and YAY KAT HAS A NEW BOOK PALETTE!

It's called the Candelabra Edition and would look killer next to my other palette book. I ADORE the colors in this one and her amazing packaging. And it comes with mascara? I'm so in. And $49 is WAY CHEAP for sixteen colors. Wow. Is it Christmas yet? I need a job.

Uh oh. Her Angeles and Truth palettes are only $15... tempting. While I'm not a huuuuuge fan of all the colors in those two, I do like a few of them. Very tempting. MUST REFRAIN FROM ADDING TO MY COLLECTION. I have a problem.

So I'm killing time before class in an hour. Today we have another visiting artist and then a test, yay. Design class this morning was brutal because I just couldn't get into my color piece. Finally I gave up and painted an eye and the weird thing is that eye gave me a lot of inspiration. So I'mma have to tackle that later today, probably after the lecture and before psych because NO INTRO TO COMM TODAY YAY :D Wednesdays blow.

xx And When I'm Not Home She Puts Her Makeup On The Shelf Marz

THE HEIR

Well I spent like, three hours laying in bed reading it. Wow, shit just got real. I can't believe he proposed to her five times before she proposed to him, in which he declined and quickly proposed to her right after. Of course she'd be bearing his child, they only had hot wild monkey sex like, nine times. I like how the book ended with her pulling him into bed as a countess. YAY SHE FINALLY MARRIED HIM AND THEY HAD KIDS AND WILD MONKEY SEX FOREVER.

And then I spent the rest of my afternoon trying to find a new book to read. I'm picky, because I don't want a vampire book, and I'd like a historical romance, but for some reason most of the books offered are about highlanders or men named Simon. I hate that name. I will honestly not read a book if I don't like the names of the characters, ha ha. I like good names. I dunno, there's gotta be something good in there somewhere.

So here I am, looking for something to read :P Nah, I need to get my printer fixed first. Man! I hate finishing books. There's a sequel that follow Dev's story, but I wasn't all that big on his character and the plot summary sounds kind of weak. It doesn't sound as raunchy, either ;P

I think I might go get Wingstop tonight. Mmmmmmm.

xx Shedding Skin To A Dying Song Marz

Moar Internet Findings

Weekend Weekend

Goddammit. I'm sitting at the computer blogging, which is a terrible reminder that I'm back in my dorm room.

It's just no fair. I had such a fun and loving weekend that seemed to last forever and not long enough at the same time. Goodbyes keep getting harder and the hugs keep getting deeper. It's weird really, sometimes I don't know what to think. And sometimes my mind goes ahead of me and I find myself all over the place. And I mean allllll over the place.

It's a night where I want to paint so bad, but I just don't have the time or energy. I'm awake, but my eyes are tired, my neck is sore, and my hands are cramped. Maybe I'll go back to working on my next tattoo idea. I like it, but things are just off and need tweaking. I can't wait for it to go on my body :) Someday I'll grow up.

xx Make A Princess Of Me Marz

Give Praise For The Blood It Bled

So I woke up today from a nap with that song stuck in my head. I haven't heard it in YEARS, but hearing it again now... oh man. It's amazing. I love duets and the dreariness and the poetical qualities it has. Good song! I need to listen to more Theater of Tragedy, they seem to be right up my alley.

Oh, my dearest; the sweet music in the ear
Albeit, daresay I, the lullaby of an everso dark sleep.

My precious,
Likest thou what emergeth yon the distant?
The throbbing and breathing of life's machinery!

Good stuff. Time to shower and do some motifs.

xx Harken The Lure Of Night Marz

Romantic

I'm listening to Laura Sullivan's "Coral Castel" while reading "The Heir", which has turned from raunchy to straight up romantic. Oh, the way Westhaven interacts with Anna, the way he kisses her neck and enjoys picnics with her, and the way she doesn't want to give into him but secretly likes it, just gets me going. This is an awesome (But probably really cheesey) book and definitely the best $6 I ever spent on reading material. When I read it, I always get filled with that familiar warm feeling mixed with chills and a fast beating heart. It's incredible.

I love love and all of its ideas. I love the effect it has and the millions of different things it inspires. I don't want to draw my motifs, I want to draw how love makes me feel. Reading about it and talking about it and spending my weekends whisked away in it just makes me feel so good. It's addicting.

xx You Have Such Oceans Within, In The End I Will Always Love You Marz

On My Mind